tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11040988827792268152023-06-20T05:52:16.020-07:00Two Brain Cells Run Amok"Geez, Dad, that wasn't a very wise decision on your part.
What are you doing, running on two brain cells again?"
Following years of hearing about my two brain cells, I
decided it was time for action; that being, the creation of
a column as a matter of revenge. Many columns
take a humorous look at everyday life. Having said that, I
must warn you in advance that some columns will be of a
more serious nature...no naps and I write mad things --
usually centered on politicians, but not always.Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-23950865436000963992019-01-01T05:45:00.003-08:002019-01-06T03:27:02.900-08:002018: The Year to Forget<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 14pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
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<span style="font-size: 14pt;">Well, like 2016/17, 2018 was a year to quickly forget. If only we could go back and redo it again, but alas, we can't. We obviously have the shutdown of the federal government, with no end in sight of reopening, unless a miracle takes place … and that isn't very likely, what with the "wall" and democrats taking over the House on January 3rd. My heart goes out to those who are unemployed through no fault of their own. Both the House and the Senate are too busy reading,</span><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> </span><b style="font-size: 14pt;">Politics for Dummies</b><span style="font-size: 14pt;">. Oh, I should mention that VP Pence and hundreds of senior political appointees (in the white house) just received a $10,000 raise ... all in the middle of the gov't shutdown. Poor timing.</span></div>
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And then again, according to the WA Post, we have President Trump espousing 15 per day of mistruths; far surpassing his record of mistruths from 2016 and 2017. I'm sure that his "base" believes every word of his mistruths … spurred on by Fox News, to which the president watches faithfully.</div>
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Then we had the major fire in California … lives lost and homes and businesses destroyed. In fact, one whole city was completely destroyed. And soon comes the rains, which will cause mudslides. Oh, and I should mention that President Trump offered this advice … that they should have "raked" the forest beforehand and they wouldn't have this problem with forest fires.</div>
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And then we had another round of mass shootings and bombs delivered to democrats and the left-leaning media. Lives lost again because we didn't see it coming beforehand. It would be later that we found out that it was "psychos" who should have been locked up previously, or given psychiatric intervention. And obviously, we had a number of school shootings in which young lives were lost forever. And we will continue in 2019 to have more mass shootings (guaranteed).</div>
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And then we have the Mueller probe, which will go on forever and ever; the democrats in the House will continue their own probe … that also is guaranteed. Unless the new Attorney General (whoever that might be) decides to shut it down, which is anybody's guess at this point.</div>
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And now we have confessions from both Manafort and Cohen. And, once again, we end up with Stormy Daniels and some other gal, who I don't recall her name (okay, you can call it dementia on my part … that's fine with me … it is what is). Besides, whatever her name is, she is not making a spectacle about herself like Stormy Daniels is. I can only guess that she isn't a "porn star" and enjoys her privacy; unlike Ms. Stormy (or whatever her real name is).</div>
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How about the stock market gyrations? Down one-day big time and up the next to set a record; fear of the unknown (or known) apparently is driving the big swings. We have trade wars, rising interest rates, an out of control deficit and the economy is expected to decline in 2019. All of which adds to the current big swings in the market. Personally, I'm so glad I pulled my stocks out of the market beforehand and put it into cash (the market be damned). At least my social security payments went up (in 2019) by 2.8% … at least I won't be starving any time soon (my sons will see to that … that's why we have children in the first place … and the only reason).</div>
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In professional sports, not that anyone really cares, we self-destructed in both D. C. and Phoenix metro areas (yes, I'm a snowbird) this year and every year. That's that the end of my comments on professional sports. It's all so depressing that I need to schedule another visit with my psychiatrist; hopefully she will provide me with more opioids.</div>
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<b>FAKE NEWS</b>. There were the two words used by the President to (more than once) describe the liberal press. By the same token, Fox News could do no wrong, which the President watches ever so faithfully to give credence as to how he is running the country. If they approve, he knows that he is running the country effectively. The liberal press and <b>all</b>democrats be damned.</div>
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In November we were treated, many times I recall, to candidates, both republicans and democrats, badmouthing each other. If nothing else, we could mute the TV and skip over the news in the papers; or we could simply switch to PBS (works for me). Of course, we always have problems with Florida counting their ballots. I'm thinking they need bigger calculators; either that or they should hire North Korea to count their ballots. I'm thinking that high IQ's don't exist in Florida.</div>
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And of course the First Lady (Melania) continues to receive more popular votes than her husband, all of which I can fully understand … she is easier on the eyes (by far). It's no wonder Melania receives more popular votes when her husband cancels both Thanksgiving and Christmas by decree. And he also had the heads chopped off the two turkeys and ate them for a snack.</div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14pt;">So, given all the bad news above, we should all forget that 2018 even existed. And we would be wise to pray to God (whoever She is) that 2019 will be better.</span>Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-71159841636193880242018-10-10T04:43:00.001-07:002018-10-11T10:59:08.916-07:00Very Strange Names<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14pt; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
As I've traveled the country, I'm always amazed at the names of towns and parks … only in America could one come up these names. I've across things like Ugly Toad Park—did they see an ugly toad and they named it as such? What were they thinking? We also have Climax, Georgia. Did someone have his or her first climax there?<o:p></o:p></div>
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We also have Boring, Oregon—if it was so boring, why did they homestead there? We also have Boring, Maryland. Oregon is also home to Idiotville—what the hell were they thinking? Were the town's people all idiots that escaped from a mental institution? One of my favorites is Hooker, Oklahoma—was the first resident there a hooker? And right next door to me is Assawoman, Maryland—did someone glance at woman with a large ass? And then we have Roachtown, Illinois—did they get overrun by roaches?<o:p></o:p></div>
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Of course, not to be outdone, we have Squabbletown, California—I'm assuming they fought a lot about what to name the town. And California also is home to Weed; which is a correct name given that they passed a Marijuana Bill last year. And then again, we have Monkey's Eyebrow, Kentucky—who, in their right mind, would like to put that as their return address? And then we have Belchertown, Massachusetts—the mayor must have belched a lot when he named that town. I'm considering moving to Loveladies, New Jersey real soon if they have lovely ladies there. I'll get on the Internet and check out the women.<o:p></o:p></div>
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And who could ever forget Hell, Michigan. Was it hotter than hell when they named the town? Or we have Hellhole, Idaho. I don't think I will not be moving there anytime soon—if ever. Twice a year, I go through Tennessee and see the road sign for Dismal—there is no way I'm stopping in that town—life can be pretty dismal as it is. There is no way I will be moving anytime soon to Disappointment, Kentucky. Between dismal and disappointment, that pretty much sums up my existence.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I may consider moving to Hopeulikit, Georgia—though Georgia isn't my first choice of states to live in. As I winter in Arizona, there is always Why, Arizona—I'm guessing the early homesteaders asked the question, why live here? If not there, how about Nothing, Arizona, or Whynot, Mississippi. Or, you can always go to Deadhorse, Alaska and see dead horses first hand, if you don't mind the smell of dead horses.<o:p></o:p></div>
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And what about Burnt Corn, Alabama? I've never been there and hopefully I will never be there—as I hate the smell of burnt corn. And returning to Arkansas, we have Possum Grape—maybe they named it after the possum's scat—which is feces to most of us. And then we have Boogertown, North Carolina—I'm thinking another town to ignore. Not to be outdone by Boogertown, we have Fleatown in Ohio, in Licking County, no less, they must lick their fleas there—I'm assuming they are pretty good sized fleas.<o:p></o:p></div>
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And why in God's name would the town's folks in Texas name their little town Looneyville—I don't care that it was named after the first guy to receive the town's mail, with a name of John Looney, I would have tarred and feathered him and run him out of town. Oh, while you are visiting Looneyville, you may want to pass through Jot-Em-Down, also in Texas. Are the Texan's really loony? My first choice would be Hooker, Oklahoma, or Hooker Hole in Louisiana—I really need to go out in style when I croak. I'm going to Hell, Michigan anyway.<o:p></o:p></div>
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They should really combine the towns of Hooker and Intercourse, Pennsylvania—same difference. Intercourse was formerly Cross Keys (founded in 1754). And to think it is in Amish country; what will they think of next? And now we have No Name, Colorado—apparently they couldn't come with a name. I'm thinking that on the ballot they had to choose between Looneyville and Boogertown, so they opted for No Name.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I seriously believe that Arkansas is the winner, with names like Fifty-Six, Romance, Smackover, Flippin and Weiner—and Texas would be a close second, even though all of the names above would garner an honorable mention. I still have to question the lunacy of the people who thought up those names.<o:p></o:p></div>
Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-53027507816620678032017-02-28T16:43:00.002-08:002017-02-28T16:43:40.169-08:00Vacations ~ Are They Really Worth It?<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
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just returned from a mini-vacation to Sedona, Arizona; something we do every
year. By we, I mean my “main squeeze” (Kit) of five years. It borders on a
miracle that she has stayed connected to me for five whole years. She’s either
very tolerant, or possibly, and I emphasize the possibly, mentally deranged.
I’ll leave that up to the people who know her well.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Actually,
this trip, we took her granddaughter with us. Okay, maybe it wasn’t really her
granddaughter that we took … as none of our four sons (two each) have blessed
us with grandchildren. Could it be that we both failed them in our “birds and
bees” conversations? Time will tell … though we (Kit & I) are both running
out of time. Who invented death, anyway? Jeez.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Okay,
I’m obviously digressing on the subject at hand. The so-called “granddaughter”
we took was actually a three-month old female puppy. To be more specific, a
Pomeranian-Poodle mix, though she appears to be more Pomeranian than Toy Poodle.
Her name, by the way, is Dakota. Oh, I should mention, though I’m not required
to, that Kit’s “love” for me was quickly transferred to Dakota. That will
obviously teach me a lesson for buying her the puppy in the first place. Maybe
I’m the one who is mentally deranged.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Anyway,
I continue to digress off the main premise of vacations, whether mini- or long
term (meaning one or two weeks). This trip, which was scheduled a few months
back, only because we stayed at an exclusive place, rained the entire time
(Yuck and more yuck). Not only did it rain, and hard, but it was cold as well;
we could even see the snow on the mountaintops. The main “touristy” part of
Sedona was totally absent of people.<o:p></o:p></div>
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So,
needless to say, we were pretty much holed up in the hotel … a hotel with their
own restaurant and bar … so not all was lost. I think it goes without saying
that we ate most of our meals at the hotel (all except for one before the rains
came). Room service is nice, isn’t it? Of course, having to “potty” Dakota was
a challenge. She doesn’t like rain any more than we do; but we managed. Or
should I say that she managed. When nature calls, she calls. The fortune part
being that just shy of three months she is pretty much potty-trained. Smart
dog.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Back
to vacations. In spite of getting away for a few days, or weeks, it is always
good to be back home. And yes, we say this every time after every vacation. Our
own bed (most important), our own showers/bathtub, our own meals, etc. All of
which makes me wonder why we even take off for a vacation anyway. Aside from
the fact that vacations put a big dent in our wallets. And I mean BIG.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
So,
why do we even bother to go on vacations? Could it be to simply break the monotony?
Even though we know that it is “great to be back home” in our comfort zone, our
daily routine. I wish I knew the answer. <o:p></o:p></div>
Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-43543271121398212382016-11-13T04:46:00.000-08:002016-11-14T10:50:00.665-08:00Spam<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
Okay,
I’m sure that I’m not the only one to get Spam. If you use a computer, you are
bound to receive Spam. Many go directly to my Spam folder but, every now and
then, one makes it way into my regular inbox.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
Just
to give you an example of what I received this, the first one is from Adult
Affairs Network Ad-Partners (whoever they are) and the Subject line says, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">New
Girlfriend Took Pics For You.</i></b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Really? Just for me? I’m honored. Of course, when you open the email,
they want you to click on their link, which, of course, will probably set a
virus loose on your computer and rob your various bank accounts. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: justify; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
The
second email, from <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">buss345</b> (what a
strange name), has a special deal on Viagra. Little do they know that I have
prostate cancer and can’t take any of those little blue pills. The third email
says, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I don’t believe my eyes! </i></b>Strangely enough, in the <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">From</b> column, it shows that it is from
none other than me, as in Michael Jennings. Interesting, as I don’t recall
having sent anything to myself lately. When I opened the email, sure enough,
there was a link just waiting for me to click on it. Do they take me for a
fool? I only open things that are sent from the Nigerian government. You know,
promising me free money. Either from an inheritance from an unknown individual,
or I won their version of the lottery. Hey, free money is free money. Click.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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The fourth
email, from none other than Ashlie, says in the subject line, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Fwd …
(12) new pics.</i></b> Upon opening the email, I’m greeted with, <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Here is the link to the pic's you asked me
for....</span></i></b><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;"> Strange, as I
don’t recall asking Ashlie for any pics. Now it makes me wonder if I’m not
developing some form of early on-set dementia.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">And this just in from Allexis: <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">HOW TO: Please Your Woman (Graphic Video).</b>
If it’s that “graphic,” I think I’ll pass. I hate sexual violence. Along the
same line, I got this one from <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">GetNaughty</b>
with the subject line being: <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Singles you
are up for a flirt tonight?</b> I think I’ll pass on that one. I’m too tired to
flirt or be flirted with. Try in the morning when I’m fully awake.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Of course I receive a number of emails
willing to lend me money even though I have a low credit score. Actually, I
have, fortunately, a credit score of 840. Of course they don’t want to pay to
check my credit score before sending me those “unbelievable” offers to lend me
money that I don’t need.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">And lastly, this one came from my good
friend Allison (whoever she is): <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">I sent
you my new pics.</b> Probably just pics from her recent vacation, huh? I think
I’ll pass on her pics too. Unless, of course, she is posing in her teeny, weeny,
yellow poka-dot bikini. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-align: justify; text-autospace: none; text-justify: inter-ideograph;">
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">There are two things I’ve noticed about
these various spam emails. First, their grammar and spelling are both
atrocious. Secondly, a number of the emails appear to be from student’s
educational accounts … as in college. Hey, one has to pay for that college
education somehow, don’t they? <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;"><br /></span>
<span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">Okay, after writing the above (and posting it), I've just received another email in my spam folder. This one purports to be directly from Dr. Oz (imagine that). I feel so blessed that he would write personally to me. His subject, dear (and fear) to all men as they get older is, <b>Whats the Shocking #1 Natural Trick to Killing E. D? </b>I'm guessing, and this is only my best guess, would be death. That would definitely kill any all E. D.</span></div>
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UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="caption"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="table of figures"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="envelope address"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="envelope return"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="footnote reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="annotation reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="line number"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="page number"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="endnote reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="endnote text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="table of authorities"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="macro"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="toa heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Bullet 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Number 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="10" QFormat="true" Name="Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Closing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" SemiHidden="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Message Header"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Date"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Hyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="FollowedHyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Plain Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="E-mail Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Top of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Bottom of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal (Web)"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Acronym"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Address"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Cite"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Code"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Definition"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Keyboard"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Preformatted"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Sample"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Typewriter"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Variable"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal Table"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="No List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Contemporary"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Elegant"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Professional"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Balloon Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Level 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true"
Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
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<br /></div>
Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-3862746933174115022013-12-31T04:50:00.002-08:002017-02-28T16:45:58.991-08:00<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
To the question presented to me:<b> </b><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">If you received a surprise package in the mail, what would you like to be in it?</span><b><u><o:p></o:p></u></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<b><u><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">A
Surprise Package<o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
Everyone loves a surprise. Birthdays.
Christmas. Anniversaries. Or any other causes for celebration. Whatever the reason, we eagerly open our
boxes with this in mind – to be surprised
– to be the recipient of the
unexpected. And often times, the bigger
the box the better. After all, big
things come in big boxes, don’t they? Well,
not necessarily, but you already know that from your own personal experience,
don’t you? A diamond ring. A gold necklace or earrings. A gift card.
I’m sure you can think of a thousand other things that are potentially big
gifts, but small in size.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
For me personally, the greatest gift that could ever be
found in a package is one that comes from the heart. In other words – a
gift of love. As a would be writer, that
“love” could be expressed in the form of the written word. From a <b><i>love interest</i></b>: A simple ‘I Love You.’ ‘You Are My Everything.’ ‘From Now Until Eternity.’ ‘I’ll Be Forever at Your Side.’ ‘There Can Be No Heaven Without You
There.’ Or <b><i>from a child</i></b>: ‘I Love You Daddy.’ ‘Daddy, We’ll Make it Through This Together.’ <b><i>From parents</i></b>: ‘We Are Proud of You.’ ‘You Are Our Pride and Joy.’ ‘You’ve Made Us So Proud.’ ‘When We Needed You the Most ~ You Were
There.’ And <b><i>from a sibling</i></b>: ‘I’ll Be Here if You Need Me.’ ‘Thanks For Being the Best Brother
Ever.’ ‘Thank You for Taking Care of
Mom.’ And let’s not forget <b><i>our many
friends</i></b>: ‘Your Friendship Means
Everything.’ ‘I Can Always Count on You
When I’m Feeling Down.’ ‘You Always Have
My Back.’ ‘I Feel Safe in Your
Presence.’ ‘Thanks for the Shoulder to
Lean On.’</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
And oftentimes, for all of the above situations, all that
a “surprise package” needs to contain is a simple ~ ‘Thank You.’ The reality is this: A “thank you” is a measure of your worth to
someone at a particular moment in time. And
“moments in time” are what we are all experiencing at this very moment. So, to all of you that read this ~ “Thank You” for
your contributions you have made to my happiness – both past and present.</div>
Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-56679066352517513322013-12-31T04:48:00.002-08:002017-02-28T16:48:24.688-08:0054 Things I've Learned Along the Road of Life<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="background: white; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">54 Things I’ve Learned </span></b><b><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="background: white; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">(Along the Road of Life)</span></b><b><span style="font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That true love comes
from giving, not receiving.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That the only friends
you will ever need in your life are the ones who are always there in your time
of need.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That rewards are
earned, not handed out.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That the meaning of
life is revealed to those who show concern for others.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That the sacrifices
one endures today will pay rich rewards tomorrow.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That the very
knowledge of love is no substitute for the actual display of love.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That even a few
“accepting” friends are worth far more than a thousand friends on any social
site.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That a heartfelt ‘I
Love You’ are the three most important words in any language.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That kindness to
others is what keeps the heart beating steadily.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. </span> <span style="background: white;">That for every beautiful memory made, some form of
love was behind it.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That the fortunes of
life received are equal to the toils endured.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That there are no
right or wrong answers to the meaning of life.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That every child
should choose their own course in life … not their parent’s wishes.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That love is the greatest
gift that God had bestowed on mankind. </span> <span style="background: white;">But
that so few ever come to realize it.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That learning to love
is a lifetime process that only comes to fruition when once we have lost
it. </span> <span style="background: white;">Only then do we
yearn for what we have lost.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That we must love
ourselves first before we can truly love someone else.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That negativity is the
opposite of love.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That saying “thank
you” should be more commonplace by all people.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That for every child
that cries out, a single heart must listen and respond.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That for every dollar
spent on those in need, two will be returned.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That only an open
heart will hear the sounds of love.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That only love can open
the doors of life.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That giving is living.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That only love can
shine through and melt the most hardened of hearts.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That all wars are a
result of the absence of love.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That without love in
our hearts, we have nothing.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That we are nothing
more than an empty shell without someone to love.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That for every tear
shed, a loved one has been missed or lost forever – though the memories, if
good, shall live forever.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That for every love
lost, a better one awaits around the corner for those that are givers.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That parental love is
the key for the continuance of love for succeeding generations.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That the heart will
never reach its capacity to give love.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That one cannot show
kindness without love in their heart for all humankind.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That aging gracefully
is more mental than physical.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That being alone does
not imply loneliness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That time can be both
your best friend and your worst enemy – depending on how you use it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That honesty in all
matters will nurture not only the mind and body, but the heart and soul as well.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That there are far
greater rewards and happiness in this life that money can’t buy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That the only proven
way to achieve happiness is by making others happy before yourself.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That peace can only be
achieved through the absence of wealth.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That children are the
answer to yesterday’s woes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That all crimes and
wars are a direct result of greed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That my
accomplishments in life are due more to learning from my mistakes than from my
successes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That the greatest acts
of kindness are those that go unrecognized by others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That if you are going
to do something, do it right or don’t do it at all. This I learned from my
father.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That promises made and
kept will hold one in high esteem.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That to bring
happiness to others, you must first be happy with yourself.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That saying “please” will
never come back to hurt you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That the better
educated I became; the less I realized I knew.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That smiles are
infectious.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That natural bonds of
love are not instantly created, but earned over time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That hate results in
wasted energy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That forgiving is part
of giving.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That listening is more
important than speaking.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I’ve learned…. That one should not
judge a fellow human being by their appearance.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="background: white; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">~ Michael R. Jennings</span></b><b><o:p></o:p></b></div>
Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-37399499183866732082013-09-28T05:39:00.001-07:002017-02-28T16:50:09.077-08:00<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
(A Tribute to Barb Who Walked With Her Joe)</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><b><u>Walk with Me</u><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><b><u><br /></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Walk with me <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
While old I grow<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Hold my hand <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Take me back <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
To my yester
years<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Walk with me<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Please guide me
along <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 184.5pt 0.0001pt 0in;">
For the once many
memories <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Are behind me now<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Forever lost in
time<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Walk with me <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Speak to me<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Of long forgotten pasts<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
And a future lost<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Within my hazy mind <o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
Walk
with me</div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
Place
my arm within yours</div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
For
the potholes of my life</div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
At
least within my mind</div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
I know
not where to step</div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Walk with me<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Be my eyes<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Refresh my mind<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Both grown cloudy<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
With the passing
years<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Walk with me<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
For I really know
not<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Where I've walked
before<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Nor where my<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Tomorrow’s lie<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Walk with me<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
My forever love<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
For you are now the me<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
That time and age<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 2.5in 0.0001pt 0in;">
Have long forgotten<o:p></o:p></div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
<br /></div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
Walk
with me</div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
Guide
me back to you</div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
For
you’ve always been</div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
The
keeper of my heart</div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
The
essence of my love</div>
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div align="left" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin-right: 2.5in;">
<b>~<i> </i></b><span style="font-size: 10.0pt;">Michael R. Jennings</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><b>©</b> 2013</span>Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-77543837285786806842013-09-28T05:28:00.000-07:002014-02-19T15:43:17.382-08:00<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>Zip Lining in Hawaii</b></div>
<br />
This piece is excerpted from a more comprehensive discussion of our recent vacation to Kona, Hawaii. A vacation that included both sons, along with Kit and Kelly.<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
Midway through our stay
there, the five of us headed out for a drive that took us approximately an hour
and a half. I don’t particularly like
long drives, but this one was worth it (maybe).
My two sons (I was hoping for girls) decided that the three of us would
go “zip lining.” You know, where you are
hanging onto an ancient, heavily worn-out cable and “zipping” along at 200
miles per hour while five miles above the ground. Okay, that might be a “slight” exaggeration
on my part, but that is exactly what I had envisioned when they mentioned zip
lining as something to do. Why I had
originally agreed to do such a thing is beyond me? For three or four days, I kept thinking to
myself, “What was I thinking? Were the
boys intentionally trying to induce a heart attack to collect on my
non-existent life insurance policy?” I
had all these visions of plus screaming down the hill while wetting my
pants. I kept telling myself, “Remember
to bring a change of clothes. This could
prove to be quite embarrassing; especially in front of Kit and Kelly.” Let’s
face it; I had a macho image to uphold, right?</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
Anyway, the hour of reckoning
was soon upon me when we arrived at the site.
The first thing the company had us do was to sign a waiver holding them
blameless for any loss of limb or life.
Yikes! My fears were now
compounded ten-fold. After signing my
waiver, I swore, then and there, that I would get even with my sons for what
was about to happen. One by one, the two
guides placed each of us in upper-body harnesses, along with an ill-fitting
helmet for me that bore evidence of having been riddled with massive
dents. Needless to say, my imagination
ran wild as to the source of those dents.
Was I about to add to those dents?
I was only a half-hour away from finding out. “Lord, have mercy on me,” I prayed over and
over.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
With the three of us, plus
another couple, about to jump into a van that would take us higher up the
mountain, I went over to Kit, gave her a kiss and said, “It was nice knowing
you.” Of course, it was easy for her to
find humor in those words as she wasn’t the one going zip lining. It wasn’t her life being put at risk. She then looked up at me and said, “Yes, it
was nice knowing you.” OMG! She has obviously been around the boys way
too much.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
By this time, the guides were
starting to get a little tired of my stalling tactics and ordered me into the
van. While in the van, I kept my eyes
closed all the way up what had to be the tallest mountain in the world. It seemed to take forever to get to the first
of seven zip lining stations. Brendan later
informed me that the ride was only twenty minutes in duration. Personally, I think his sense of “time” is
way off. Possibly caused by too many
drinks the night before. That’s my side
of the story, and I’m sticking to it.
Perception is reality, you know.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
Note: There were seven “jumping off” platforms in
total. Each one longer and higher (from
the ground) than the one before it. As I
stood on the first platform, I could see that it appeared to be at least a mile-long – even though the sign on the platform read
fifty yards. Whoever made up that sign
clearly had no handle on distance. Most
likely, American schooled. Because I was
brought up to let others go first, I was the last of the five to go screaming
off the first platform. The elderly lady
who went first never made a whimper. I’m
thinking just maybe she was blind – what you can’t see won’t scare you. That’s the only excuse I could come up with
for her lack of screams on all seven jumps.
Either that or her husband loaded her up with anxiety medications. I wish I had thought of bringing some.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
I begged the guide to allow me
to walk to the second platform because I found this first jump to be non-challenging
and made for children – something I felt was beneath me. The next thing I knew was the feeling of a
slight push on the back, and away I went flying (ready or not). What seemed like a one-hour flight on the
overhead cable was probably no more than 20 seconds. As it turned out, it was pretty cool; except
for trusting that the cable wouldn’t break.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
I won’t bore the reader with
the next five jumps. With each “flying
through the air” experience, I gained more confidence as we went along; except
for trusting that the cable wouldn’t break.
The seventh and last of the runs was to be the longest and highest. I’m not sure as to the actual length of the
run. I just knew that I couldn’t see the
end of it. By this time, however, the
word “fear” was no longer part of my vocabulary; just the part about trusting that
the cable wouldn’t break remained with me.</div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
This last jump would take us
directly over a large waterfall that appeared to run to the center of the
earth. In actuality, by the time I was
directly overhead, I was a mere 3,000 feet above the bottom of the
waterfall. And to further live up to my
“macho man” reputation, I even took a series of pictures with my camera as I
sailed over the waterfall – using no hands to hang onto the harness as I
snapped the pictures, I might add.
Pretty brave, huh? Would I do zip
lining again? In a heartbeat.</div>
Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-61275432293016843232013-06-13T01:06:00.004-07:002016-11-01T08:45:23.892-07:00One Moment in Time<div align="center" class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;">One Moment in Time</span></b><span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 14.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">A special lady in my life posed a “what
if” question of me the other day. The
question being: <b>If you could relive any
one day of your life, which would it be and why? </b>An interesting question to say the
least. If one has lived long enough,
it’s a question they have answered, or at least tried to, more than once. It’s the kind of question that makes one
think and to look back at their life, as one does in a rear-view mirror, for
that one pivotal moment that changed everything. Or it could be that one special day or moment
that brought them the greatest joy. The
possible moments for most individuals are endless. Fell in love.
A wedding day. The birth of a
child. Your first car. Going off to college. The list of special moments could fill a book. There is no right or wrong answers. Whatever one comes up with for an answer is
unique to that individual. No one would
(or should) place a value judgment on your “special” day or experience; unless
you committed a heinous crime, of course.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">For some, that special moment could have
manifested itself in some monumental way – surviving a plane crash, almost
drowning, finding yourself in the middle of a burning building, the death of a
child, a sibling, a spouse, a parent.
For others, it could be something as simple as holding a baby in your
arms for the first time, bringing home a puppy, watching a rainbow form and
fade in the glistening sunlight, your first crush.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Regardless of what it is, it’s a moment
generally tucked away in our minds until something, or someone, brings it back
to life … and we smile at its recollection.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">So I pause to ask myself, ‘What is <b>my</b> defining moment?’ Or do I even have
a defining moment? If you’re my age, you
have a lot of life to look back on. The
answer, quite naturally, would come a lot easier for those that are still teens
or in their early twenties. Ah, to be
that age again. So, never one to back
down from a reasonable challenge … I pondered … and pondered some more. And then it came to me. It is not a “moment in time” that I would
necessarily need to relive, as it was a defining moment in who I was to
become. The exact day (as in actual
date) is unknown to me. The date,
however, is unimportant; it’s the actual moment, the personal experience that
the above question begs to answer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">It was in the winter of 1963. I was aboard a Naval aircraft carrier. We were being escorted into Hong Kong harbor by
tugboats in the darkness of the early evening.
It was chilly. As was the custom
when pulling into any port, we enlisted personnel were lined up, side by side,
along the outer perimeters of the flight deck in our dress blues, hands clasped
behind our backs. Standing alongside of
me was what we call a “lifer,” – an enlisted man with 26 years of service
behind him. This was to be his final
cruise before retiring from the service.
He, like me, worked in the Personnel Department. He was not only my mentor, but my closest
friend. When I came aboard ship for the
first time as an eighteen year-old, he immediately took me under his wings. Being unsure of myself and undergoing a new
and unknown environment, I was grateful for his reaching out to me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">As we slowly made our way into port, I
could clearly see a vast array of tall buildings dotting the landscape – a
combination of office buildings, hotels and apartments. With the blessings of an almost full moon, I
could see the distinct outline of a mountain ridge rising up and behind the
various buildings.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">And then came the moment of
enlightenment. Glancing to the left of
the city I could make out what appeared to be hundreds, if not thousands, of
flickering lights of some sort dotting the mountainside. None of which appeared to be coming from any
building, but the mountain itself.
Turning my head slightly to the right, I asked my mentor what the
flickering lights were all about.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Without a slightest turn of his head, he
answered, “Those lights you see in the hillside are basically nothing more than
what we would call campfires. Hong Kong,
like anywhere else, has their share of poor.
The poorest of the poor have dug what we would call caves into the side
of the mountain. That is where they,
both individuals and families, sleep at night.
That is their home. The campfires,
set just outside of the caves, are the only means available to them for fending
off the cold winter nights. Tomorrow,
when there is adequate sunlight, you will see another class of the poorest …
those who live and fish for their existence aboard sampans. They cover the harbor by the thousands.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">As an eighteen year-old know-it-all who
grew up in a middle-class environment, I was shocked by what he had just shared
with me. I had no idea that people
actually lived like this in other parts of the world. It would be some years later before I would
learn that millions of people in my own country lived in abject poverty – much
the way the people living in Hong Kong did back in 1963.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">As we continued to inch our way into the
harbor, my eyes and thoughts remained on the flickering campfires. And then it happened … the emotions I never
knew I had kicked in and the tears began to roll from my eyes. At first slowly … and then in a torrent. My mentor, breaking protocol, reached over
and placed his left hand on my shoulder.
Without looking my way, he said, “Son, I reacted the same way as you
when I first entered this harbor some twenty odd years ago. It’s okay.
Just remember that what you’ve seen this evening and vow, in your own way, to
right the wrongs of life. You already
have far more benefits in this life then these people will ever have. Your personal goals are probably college,
marriage, children, and a house with a fence around it. Their goal, on a daily basis, is, ‘where will
my next meal come from; or will I even have a next meal.’ So keep in mind, always, that no matter how
little you think you have, no matter the obstacles you may face in life’s
journey, these people will have 100 times less benefits than you. They are fighting daily for their very existence. Something you and I never give a thought to. Or at least I hope we never have to.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt;">His words went a long way in consoling
me … but still the tears flowed. If
nothing else, I grew up that dark, chilly evening in Hong Kong. I have the campfires, the caves, and the
people living in them to thank. It was
that “moment” in which I finally came to realize that there are other human
beings in this world besides me -- not only other beings, but people in far
dire straits than I would ever encounter in my lifetime. Oh, like most people, I have encountered my
fair share of problems, for which I most likely blamed my God for having
inflicted them upon me. But those
problems, like all the others before them, quickly passed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<span style="font-family: "times new roman" , "serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%;">Anymore, when I am
faced with what appears to be insurmountable obstacles, I think back to those
campfires, either consciously or unconsciously.
I’ve come to realize, and accept, the fact that I am not exactly what
one would refer to as a “macho man.” I
have a tendency to openly shed tears while reading a sad part in a novel, watching
a tear-jerking movie, or reading about a real-life event of something
heroic. It’s just me. Don’t ask me why. I can’t explain it other than taking someone
on a “memory tour” that took place in the winter of 1963. This one moment in time was life defining for this 18 year-old kid.</span>Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-13039452225684129312013-01-16T05:33:00.001-08:002013-12-31T04:57:59.778-08:00Toothpaste Delight - NOT!You ever have one of those days where it didn't start out right? Where you should have just stayed in bed and not gotten out of bed until the next day? Well of course you have. We all have.<br />
<br />
After finishing my breakfast (the boys were at work), I headed off to my son's bathroom to brush my teeth ... at least those that are left (a result of candy, coke, Twinkies and potato chips when I was a kid). I noticed a small tube of my son's toothpaste standing upright on the bathroom counter and proceeded to squeeze the paste onto my Sonicare. When I travel, it goes with me. Electric toothbrushes take the hard work out of brushing. Anyway, I spent the next three-minute cycle attacking all the vile germs that just love to find a happy home on my teeth. But something wasn't quite right. The toothpaste had a strange taste and feel to it. Hey, I told myself, everyone has their own preference in toothpaste. If it cleans, it cleans.<br />
<br />
After brushing my teeth and rinsing my mouth out, I decided to check out his brand of choice. It turned out be a brand most of us have heard of, but seldom, if ever, used on our teeth, let alone in the mouth -- Cortisone. You know, the stuff that one applies to heal wounds ... not clean teeth. Upon that discovery, I headed directly back to bed ... hopefully not to wake up until the following morning. <br />
<br />
<br />Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-5458574863765604282012-06-28T10:55:00.002-07:002013-12-31T04:59:47.656-08:00Some Assembly Required<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;">During the move from Seattle to
Scottsdale last year, I took along three bookcases totaling ten feet wide by
seven feet tall. One two-footer went MIA. A second one, four feet wide, was
virtually destroyed. With only one bookcase surviving, it was time to order new
ones. I’m not one for hitting the road and looking at what the various
furniture stores have to offer — aside from the fact that they are usually overpriced.
So, I took the lazy and cheap way out — I ordered two of them online. What
really turned me on to these particular bookshelves was the fact that it said,
“Some Assembly Required.” That alone was music to my ears as directions
and me don’t always see eye to eye (I’m convinced that it’s a male thing). As
it turned out, however, it should have read, “Total Assembly Required,
Must Have a Degree in Engineering.
Individuals with Only Two Brain Cells Should Not Attempt Assembly. Ask
for a Woman’s Help.” Yeah, like that last part will ever happen. We bachelors have
too much pride to ask for a woman to help on a simple project of this nature; even though we secretly admit to ourselves
that they are better at reading instructions than we are. This last sentence will self-destruct after
reading.</span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;">As I said above, there were two new bookshelves laying on the floor in their packages. The assembly of the first one by little ol’ me involved a string
of never-before-used swear words, five drinks, two packs of smokes,
a smashed thumb (still relearning how to use a hammer), and four chill pills.
Total time to assemble — four hours. The instruction booklet, in size two font,
was in English, Spanish and French. I probably would have been better off
choosing to follow either the Spanish or French versions. Of course,
the instructions and everything else were made in China (what isn’t these
days?). The spelling and grammar were definitely at a fourth grade level — which didn't help as I’m
not quite there yet.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;">They showed pictures of the parts
page (nuts, bolts, shelves, etc.) but gave no quantities. The biggest fear of
assembling anything is that they did not send enough parts. In my case, they
over-sent, which immediately made me question whether or not I had left something
out during assembly. When they said to screw something in with your fingers … forget it. The
screws required my biggest hammer. Then, to add insult to injury, they took
their big “Made in China” label and glued it right to the finished side-panel
for all the world to see. I tried peeling it off, but that didn’t work. I then
tried hot, soapy water on a rag, but that didn’t work either. I eventually
resorted to looking through my arsenal of dangerous chemicals and finally chose
Goo Gone … it worked. Disclaimer: I have
no fiduciary interest in Goo Gone, but that stuff really, really works
miracles. Anyway, I’m not sure who the actual engineer was that chose the
particular glue for the label, but he or she must have first developed the glue for
the space shuttle’s outer tiles. If Goo Gone didn’t work, my next option was going
to be a couple of M-80’s that I had leftover from the 4</span><sup style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;">th</sup><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"> of July. Hey, when desperate, one must resort to desperate measures. Right guys?</span></b><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;">When I got up the following morning,
I took on the second bookshelf … completing that one in one hour flat…minus ten
minutes of “stupid time” on my part. The bottom line — they look nice … well
worth the investment in spite of the “hell” the first one put me through. Be
forewarned: the next time you (males only) see something that says “some assembly
required,” look out. If you aren’t willing to ask for help (from a woman), then
prepare yourself by having enough smokes, alcohol and drugs on hand to tackle
the project. Or you could just invite your male buddies over to watch sports
and get wasted while assembling whatever it was you were stupid enough to buy
in the first place. If their IQ happens to be in your range (mine hovers around
50 -- on a good day), then you can fully expect disaster.</span></b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1104098882779226815.post-89428757776589338002012-06-16T13:21:00.001-07:002013-12-31T05:01:00.539-08:00Things I Hate<div style="text-indent: 0px;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;">* </span></span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">Bacon grease splattering on my shirt
that I have only worn for six straight days.</span></b></div>
<div style="text-indent: 0px;">
<span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-weight: bold; line-height: 16px;">*</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">Finding out that my two other shirts
are in the dirty clothes hamper.</span></b></div>
<div style="text-indent: 0px;">
<span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">* <span style="font-weight: bold; line-height: 115%;">14 socks going into the washing
machine and only 13 coming out of the dryer.</span></span></div>
<div style="text-indent: 0px;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; line-height: 16px;">*</span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">People who laugh at me on the 7<sup>th</sup>
day when I’m only wearing one sock.</span></b></div>
<div style="text-indent: 0px;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Discovering that you are out of
toilet paper at the moment of need.</span></b></div>
<div style="text-indent: 0px;">
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* When preparing to have a grilled
cheese sandwich for dinner, you discover that the </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">cheese has mold on it.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* After scraping the mold off the
cheese, you discover that the bread is moldy as well.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Spilling tomato soup on your
upholstered chair that you had professionally cleaned the day </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">before.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Pouring tons of paint into the paint
tray </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">—</span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;"> only to discover that
you don’t have any paint </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">rollers.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* When your AC unit quits on the hottest day of the year.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* When your heating system decides to go on vacation on the coldest day of
the year.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* When the repair people say that they can get to you in about a week
(maybe).</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* I hate people that spam. Oh wait, I’m not supposed to hate people.
Therefore, I detest, </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">loathe, despise, scorn, and dislike intensely people who
spam.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Women who approach me in my awesomely
restored ’69 pickup and say, “Nice truck, too </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">bad you come with it.” May a
thousand elephants fly up their collective noses.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Making a special dessert only to find out that you are missing one key
ingredient </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">—</span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;"> like something </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">simple -- </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">apples for an apple pie.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Cracking a double-yoked egg onto the skillet and suddenly thinking that
the two yoke eyes </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">are staring up at me yelling, “Baby Killer.”</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Knowing that I’m a twin and wishing that I could go back in time and
punch her lights out in </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">the womb for all the “ratting” on me that was to haunt
me for the first 18 years of my life.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Measuring it twice, cutting it once…and still getting it wrong.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* The hardware store that </span><span style="line-height: 16px;">wouldn't</span><span style="line-height: 115%;"> take my measuring tape back because it
consistently </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">caused me to measure things wrong. </span><span style="line-height: 16px;">Gees</span><span style="line-height: 115%;">.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Companies, large and small, that never respond to email request for
information. If there is </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">potentially no money in it for them, they are
typically not interested in taking the time to </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">respond. LG is an excellent exception
to that rule.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Computers that freeze up ONLY when you are working on something
important.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* The 2,384 prompts you have to go through just to talk to a live person on the phone.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Incomprehensible instructions on how to put something together.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* The $40 to $60 “Trip Fees” that many companies charge to send someone out
to repair </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">whatever it is you need repairing. I firmly believe they copied that
from the airline baggage </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">fee concept.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Companies that charge money for just giving you an “estimate” on their
potentially doing </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">some work for you.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Buying a house that the 231 previous owners before you have modified
and/or repaired just </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">about everything … all the wrong way.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Having repairmen exaggerate or make up the extent of your problem.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Having to pay another company to disprove the above repairmen’s
exaggerations.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Breaking my favorite ceramic butter dish.</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Buying a replacement butter dish and promptly breaking it as well
(ceramic dishes and granite </span></b><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 16px;">counter-tops</span><span style="line-height: 115%;"> just don’t like each other).</span></b><br />
<b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">* Not being able to find a decorative butter dish made of unbreakable plastic.</span></b><br />
<b style="background-color: white;"><span style="line-height: 115%;"><br /></span></b>
<b style="background-color: white;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">I’m sure that all of my readers
(three at last count) have similar things they hate. If so, send </span></b><b style="background-color: white;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">them my way
and I will include them in the next installment of “Things I Hate.” Whenever
that </span></b><b style="background-color: white;"><span style="line-height: 115%;">is ... depending on my nap schedule, of course.</span></b></div>
Michael R. Jenningshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00488607072320365341noreply@blogger.com0